crankyuser

Mistaken identities

My good friend Robert Khoo and I are sometimes mistaken for each other at networky events, despite his short hair, lack of glasses, lack of piercings, business casual attire, and being far louder and wirier (but fighting dirty). While somewhat an honor, we typically file the offender under "confuses Asians easily," and put them on an internal shit list. The latest evidence:

"Hey, Robert!"

"...it's actually Brian. You're Kevin, right? I think I met you at Tami's, with you and...Nikki?"

"Oh yeah, my girlfriend. She's not here because she's working, at EBX."

"Is she trying to get into the industry?"

"Yeah, she's into abstract design, like GUI work."

"Hey, that's what I'm working on these days."

"Don't you work at Penny Arcade?"

"...no. I work at Monolith. On the Matrix Online."

"Ah."

Later I met a guy from my company who thought I had gone snowboarding with him, when in fact I had only had Indian buffet with him once, where he spent most of his time vomiting in the bathroom because of a physical condition. Turns out he was confusing me with the other Asian guy who was at that same lunch; he first met us both that day.

I preferred the other guy from my company, who is bad with names -- stemming from a martial arts accident in which he caused three parts of his brain to hemorrhage internally. He at least knows who I am and whether he vomited around me, even if he can't remember my name.

Maybe I need more facial piercings. Would that help?